Mother's Day

Mother's Day

     I was asked this week "What has been your best Mother's Day?"  In all honesty, I don't really know how to answer that question, simply because each day feels like Mother's Day to me!  Cole was a little over five months old when I celebrated my first official Mother's Day and it wasn't the best.  I was happy to be a mom and I was beyond happy to celebrate this day with my mom and Nanny Comp.  Twelve years later, I can look back and say I love Mother's Day now, but when Cole couldn't tell me I love you, show me how much he loved me, or even know what Mother's Day was about was not the best.  You see, it takes a special kind of mom to realize what you have and don't have.  I was not happy in my marriage, I wanted to feel safe and loved, but most of all, I wanted to be the kind of mom my mom had been to me:  a woman who devoted her life to me and my brother to make sure we knew we were loved and taken care of until we became independent adults.  My brother and I are very close and I know it's because of my mom.  I love my daddy, and I have always been a daddy's girl, but my mom is the glue that keeps us together.  I speak for both of us when I say we are blessed to have a mom that always made sure we stayed out of trouble and had friends that always had our best interests.  Our mom is an amazing person, friend, but most of all she is a great mom.  I know I have put my mom through a lot in life, but I now realize she did a lot for us, simply because that is how she was raised.  

     I have talked about my Nanny Comp. and my mom, but I feel it's necessary to talk about the elephant in the room.  There will be tears shed for moms who are no longer with us, moms who should NOT be moms, and there are people that should be moms and can't, simply because of nature.  I have been blessed to have an awesome mom, but I also consider a few other people in my life to be moms to me as well.  

     Lavern Marr is one of those amazing people that can light up a room with her smile, her warm demeanor can melt your heart, but most of all, she is a kind-hearted woman that cares about everyone.  I haven't seen Lavern since August 2013, simply because of her health.  Lavern is like a second mom to me and to my mother.  She is an amazing person and I am beyond blessed to call her and her family an extension of my family.  People like Lavern Marr, Mac Cullum, and Mattie Bess Pou just don't come into your life and say hello.  These women are pioneers and amazing moms.  I have been blessed by these three women in particular, simply because they saw something in me and gave me my wings to fly.  Mac Cullum and I would talk on the phone for hours on end, then Mac would realize what time it was-- dinner!  Her husband, Charles Cullum, was a great man.  He loved Mac and Lee and I am forever grateful for these wonderful people.  Mac didn't know (or so I thought) I was getting a divorce, but I was able to talk to her and tell her I was unhappy in my marriage.  I was surprised when she told me, "Erika, you only live once.  You deserve a man like my Charlie.  You are Miss America and you should be treated like Miss America.  Let me set you up with Robert Redford because he's available!".  Seriously, Mac was not kidding!  Lee was going to interview him and Mac knew I loved Robert Redford.  I have never met Robert Redford, but love all of his movies.  What is so surprising to me is that I married a man with the same name-- I will let you figure that out later!

     Mattie Bess Pou was the wife of Garvice and mom to Dickey Pou.  These two men were something else!  They both loved Mattie Bess and God Bless Mattie Bess-- she was something else.  You could fall in a hole and she would say, "Well, did you have fun doing it?".  Mattie Bess was my Nanny Comp's best friend.  When Nanny Comp got sick, Mattie Bess would be the one I would call every day just to say hi.  I cherished those visits and phone calls, up until 2011.  I needed Mattie Bess as much as I needed Nanny Comp.  Without Mattie Bess, I don't know how I would have gotten through my grandmother's death in 2004.  She was a woman of God and had a spirit that was simply amazing.  Mattie Bess died in February 2011 and I know she is in Heaven with her Garvice, my grandparents, and her son Dickey.  Dickey was very sick for a long time and my mom and I both thought he held on for Mattie Bess.  He died six months after Mattie Bess passed away.  If you knew Mattie Bess, then you knew she was never sad.  She always had a song in her heart, a prayer on the tip of her tongue, and a forgiving attitude.  Her smile could captivate a room!  I was blessed to know this woman.  She saw me through tough times, graduate from SMU, and meet my now husband.  Mattie Bess was one of a kind.

     The reason I am devoting this post to these women (and all moms) is because they shaped me into the woman I am today.  Mac, Lavern, Mattie Bess, Nanny Comp, Coach King, and my mom, Gwyn Kelley, were the women that inspired me to be the best mom and wife I could be.  I can get frustrated at times with life, simply because I strive to be the best at everything, but in all honesty, I think I am a pretty good mom.  Cole now says "I love you mom" and that's plenty for me!  For the first time mom, cut yourself some slack.  In the blink of an eye, your baby will be grown.  I am beyond blessed that God picked me to be Cole's mom.  I really don't think I could do any better as Cole's mom.  Love one another, be kind, and tell your mom you love her because you never know when that last Mother's Day is.  I love you mom.