My Health and Cole's Education

My Health and Cole's Education 

     My life as a mom never stops.  I have a brief moment to myself that I enjoy, which is yoga.  I love being a mom and a wife, but at times, it can be down-right exhausting.  I don't always have the best of health, which deters from daily living, but I try to always go about my day and enjoy every minute, even if I am in tremendous pain.  I strive to always do my best, but sometimes my best is just not good enough for even me.  If this is too personal, skip this paragraph because it's about my personal health.  I have suffered from horrendous menstrual cramps since I was 14 years old.  I had to miss days from school in high school because of this problem.  I also suffer from ovarian cysts.  I have had two surgeries to remove ovarian cysts, which is not fun.  My cramps are so bad that I can't get out of bed.  I am lucky that I can get up in the morning, make breakfast and lunch for Cole, only to get back into bed because of this problem.  I changed doctors two years ago and this was the best decision I ever made!  She is terrific.  She understands me, simply because she is a wonderful doctor and friend.  The best advice I can give you if you are a woman, see a woman gynocologist.  I still suffer from cramps, but hopefully next month will be better because I have a new pain medication (plus back on the pill).  

     The reason I am writing this next paragraph is because I need to get this out there.  Some people shouldn't be parents.  There are other couples that would make terrific parents, but were unable to conceive or had the money to adopt.  Adoption is very expensive and even if you are middle-class family, this is one option that just may not be affordable to many.  I would love to have a child with my husband, but this may not happen, due to my health and age (40).  I am fortunate that I have an incredible son and the most loving husband who adopted Cole.  Their love for one another is something that you just can't put into words.  I would love to have a baby with my husband, simply because it's the greatest gift God gives us.  However, I am extremely blessed to have a child.  So many people can't have children, which to me, is so sad.  I know three couples that would make great parents right now, but due to unforeseen life circumstances they are unable to conceive.  The best advice I can give to parents is BE A PARENT.  BE THERE FOR YOUR CHILD.  

     I have been blessed to have created the Bebop Girls and Cole Warren and the Jambox Boys out of love for Cole and music.  This phenomenon that has taken place in our house the past three years is a gift from God.  I have had over at least twenty kids at our house the past three years and I have witnessed bad behavior, insecure behavior, and good behavior.  There is one kid that is in one of the groups (I will not name them, simply because it's rude), that is downright insecure, rude, and disrespectful.  The parents on the outside look okay, but I know if you went behind closed doors, you would see something totally different.  I have put up with this child's behavior for a long time, simply because I feel he needs this group so much.  I have been on this child's case for a long time about how to behave and the others have gotten on to him as well, but I am done with the sass, attitude, and talking back.  He is gone.  I am not paid by the parents to run these groups, "Cole Warren and the Jambox Boys" or the "Bebop Girls".  I started these groups out of love for Cole and I can end them as soon as they started.  

     The "Bebop Girls" are getting really good and they are wonderful girls.  I couldn't ask for more from them!  The original girls from the group are so busy that we had to add new faces.  I didn't kick the original girls out, but we kept going, simply because they have gotten really good (and Cole loves them all)!  I am blessed by all of the girls and boys that are in the Jambox Boys and Bebop Girls, simply because I think it teaches them that different is okay. Just yesterday, we were at 7-11 (me, Cole, and 3 Bebop Girls) and out of nowhere, Cole starts a normal conversation with a dad and his two year old son, Logan.  "Hi!  My name is Cole.  What's yours?"  This is something that I have dreamed about for 12 years.  Turns out, the dad knew Cole has autism because he babysat a boy when he was a junior in high school that had autism.  His best friend has autism and they were classmates at McKinney High School.  To this day, they are still best of friends.  Life hands you lemons, so you make lemonade out of it.  Yesterday, I witnessed an amazing life event.  Cole knew what to say, how to socialize with his friends at 7-11 and Starbucks, and then headed off with confidence to my high school homecoming's football game.  Again, if you have a child on the autism spectrum, there is hope.  Don't give up!  Be that parent who goes above and beyond for your child, even if they don't have a learning difference or disability.

     My new job is exciting!  Cole was in choir at his school the first six weeks and I applaud his teacher for trying to understand him.  He started off the school year great, except in choir.  Cole's teacher and I communicated via email every week and she would give me an update as to how Cole was doing.  I decided to make a personal decision for Cole that he didn't need to be in choir.  Choir is difficult, even if you are not someone that has autism.  I now know it was the right decision because I have been given an opportunity that I was not expecting:  teaching music every week in Cole's special education class during fourth period!  Cole's special education teacher, Tricia Tamayo, is a God-send.  She asked me if I would like to teach music to her class every week, and of course I jumped at the chance!  I am a bit nervous, but I know it will be a great experience, as it will help me create a working foundation for my workshop I am presenting in February at the annual TMEA convention, "Special Education, Music, and Technology".  I hope to eventually create a curriculum based on current music, the technology that is out there for music, and make sure ALL KIDS that have an I.E.P. or 504 receive music in their class in the state of Texas.  This is no small feat, but I have never been one to shy away from a challenge.  For now, this is the best I can do:  give my son and his classmates the best music education money can't buy.  I am so excited and I will keep you updated with this new endeavor!

     Have a wonderful weekend, enjoy your life, but most of all, be present.  You never know what life has in store for you, but if you give it all you have, in the end, you will have no regrets.  I know I don't have any regrets when it comes to my professional or personal life.  Learn from your mistakes, grow from those mistakes so you don't do them again, and love yourself.  Be kind to one another, but most of all, enjoy the moment!